Said law runs along the lines of 'Whatever can go wrong, with go wrong'.
However, they usually don't have the experience of the universe fucking them over continually in fantastically obnoxious ways to back up their claim.
I do.
Added to my personal 'This Universe Abhors my Existence' list is Thursday 10th of July's epic rift on the key of:
When I travelled for 2 hours to get from my hostel to the college campus where I take my classes every two weeks, I arrived to find that the staff, all the staff, including the IT staff, had been given the day off.
The above meant that the IT suites were all closed, and the reception staff said I couldn't use the computers at the campus without my tutor arranging it.
My tutor arranging it. My tutor who I spoke to yesterday to ask what I needed to do to be able to use a PC today, and who told me that I just needed to arrive with my username and password.
So yesterday I was checking in with the benefits office so I could survive for two more weeks.
And tomorrow I was planning on working at the hostel (although I since looked into the local library for use of a table out of sense of the floor).
So the one single day I need the college to permit me access to their computers IS ALSO the same damn day they decide on unison to not be there.
Tomorrow they are, and I can see them if I want to spend 4 hours travelling to them but if I did this it would be on legs that I shouldn't have used to go there today because all this rushing about is starting to wear me down.
It's like someone checked my thoughts, checked reality, and organised it this morning, for that's when they were told they had the day off, to not be there.
Under normal circumstances any reasoning being would think 'ah, this is an unfortunate coincidence'.
Personally I reflect on my last couple of weeks. That I got a chest infection one week before a fitness test and an exam. Then evicted a few days before two exams. Then need to renter an underground station that only permits exit to make my moving easier. Then Barclays trying to charge me £150 for one of their bikes that I returned to a docking station (the 6 quid that turned into 30 was half their and half my fault so I discount that one). And so on.
That's more or less how my life has worked since birth.
Born to anti-intellectual troglodytes with a prodigious intelligence and curiosity.
Educated in the presence of spiteful nasty bullies which disabled my memory through stress.
Then attending a university which failed dramatically to teach me jack shit about the subject I signed up for.
Mostly I just consider my life to be permanently shit and go around hating humanity as a misanthrope (its only sense).
But lately Ive started to wonder if there isn't some utter asshole doing his best to fuck my shit up whenever he finds an opportunity to do so.
Humans historically ascribe this kind of bullshit asshattery to deities great and small out of the permanent need to explain the unexplainable.
I've never been inclined to believe in what I can't see and interact with, but given what I have seen and had to deal the ass end of over the last few weeks, I'm trying to think of a name for the incorporeal ass spirit that is making my life hell.
I'm sure I'll come up with something eventually that's a little more poetic but currently Im settling for Mr. Cockblaster.
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I have arranged to do my college work at the hostel and library (like I said above) so Ill get on with that tomorrow.
This weekend though Im opting for sleeping in the park. Literally.
The room I booked is 10 miles away, will cost 35 quid for 2 nights, and involve me shipping all my shit across London again.
Putting me shit into hostel storage for 2 days, taking a nap outdoors in the sun (or muggy heat anyway) whilst reading my college text book outside or inside the library saves me the money and exertion.
Then on Monday I clean up, have bonus food budget, and can sleep in a real bed whilst doing my college work at the library.
It's a dam stupid solution but its effect can't be questioned and its only two days and then Ill never need to do it again during my 8 week penance for sins I never committed.
I'm not batting an eye lid at sleeping rough for 2 days at this point. In my book Ive done fucking well to get as far as I have. If I make it the full term Im going to call the Vatican and inform them of the miracle...or maybe Merlin given that Im more Magus than Priest.
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And that bit of stupidity about wraps it up really.
Getting some food and then spending more than an hour in a shower somewhere to shave my head.
A part of me wants to bone this American chick who's staying in the same room as me. Not bright so its a non-starter but she's got this amazing husky voice and tanned skin. Some American girls are really freaking hot to me like that for some reason.
Anyway. Food, shower, sleep, college work, then check out, college work, rough sleep, college work, rough sleep, check in, clean up, college work, etc.
Till tomorrow, get fucked and die.
PS: I LOVE THE IRON DRUID CHRONICLES. :O
