Starting this post early with good news.
--- // ---
Around 10am right now, just woke up, checked my email from the manager of my certificate in basic policing course, and he told me I aced [scored 100%] on my Week 5 exam. xD
That's amazing. I had the flu, had been awake since 1am, tail end of the weekend from hell, and yet I was still able to roll up in that class and word vomit out all the answers to a freaking exam.
On the one hand, I wanted to die and left the class early and barely made it home to bed before passing out. And on the other hand, I aced an exam in the middle of it when I nearly fell asleep on the desk three or four times that day.
There are distinct advantages to being an abused genius, not least that my brain is GENIUS BRAIN and still operates rather well despite being the universe's favorite chew toy. xD
Not bad.
I am going to get to college this weekend on a full nights sleep, solid revision and well fed before my next two exams. Highly confident [he says this now and JINXES it] that the next two will be no problem.
Good morning. ^-^
---
...Good grief, some people need a grow a sense of the dramatic. xD
Said to my course tutor, 'I can't believe I passed that with 100%, that weekend was a nightmare' in an email, and he replied back with 'I have double checked the results [totally deadpan] and it is 100%'...awesome...thanks...didn't mean you to do that you piece of bloody cardboard, THANKS THOUGH. xD
Taking enjoyment in your work, being casual, playing along, to me it's what makes doing anything worth doing it, but with some people they just can't see the rub.
--- // ---
Now around 12:30, just got dressed and about to clean my abode some before a photographer comes by after 4 tonight to take pictures for the estate agents.
Bit unsure what they're going to make of the fact that I've covered the vent in my room with duck tape after it grew these tendrils of dust or something and I didn't want to be breathing whatever it was spewing into my room. On the other hand though it's the landlady's issue and not mine. By law it's her responsibility to look after those types of things. I've not directly damaged the walls, the mold got there by itself by the properties design, so I've got nothing to worry about in terms of repairs.
---
In passing I emailed my college to see if my 24+ Student Loan has gone through to pay for my Certificate in Basic Policing course.
It hasn't.
Applied for it more than twelve weeks ago, missed section 4.1.1 and 4.1.2 [why yes, I have memorized the fucking numbers thank you so very much], and ever since they've refused to process it.
I've phoned them, Student Finance England, and had them confirm my identity and ask them why it hasn't been processed. Then when they said it was because they hadn't confirmed if I was in arrears with my full time student loan [section 4, two boxes] I said I didn't think so and asked them to check their systems. They did and confirmed that I wasn't, but said they needed it in writing. So I sent them a letter with the information in it with my signature. I filed a complaint when they still failed to process it via email and the complaints department at SFE checked with the 24+ Student Loan department and they confirmed I was allowed it, but they needed the actual form. So I sent them the actual form. Just after I sent it, a letter arrived titled 'We Need More Information From You'. I had just sent them the actual form so I decided to let that stand for my reply. More than two weeks later, now, I check and they still haven't fucking processed it. So tomorrow I need to fill out this fucking letter form and try again.
Just asked them to pass my complaint to the independent assessors, which is stage 2 of their complaints procedure [customer service, complaints department, independent assessors] to see if they will process it.
After that, we're onto the lawyers.
God dam it, I swear no one else has to go through this ridiculous shit but me.
---
I still can't fucking believe I passed that exam. xD
I was just so fucked up that weekend, what with the flu and the sleeplessness and everything.
Epic.
--- // ---
Cleaned up. Did washing up. Had foods. Very full. More cleaning. College work.
--- // ---
I've taken about 9 caffeine pills in the last 3 hours, and still feel tired. And each one is worth about 2 large cans of Red Bull...I think I have a fucking epic level of immunity to my favourite stimulant.
--- // ---
North Korea threatens war on US over Kim Jong-un Movie
- http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-28014069
The biggest joke of a nation on Earth, North Korea, decided that a movie about assassinating their tyrant made by the biggest sartorial nation on earth [in the sense of having the sense of humor of five year old boys], the US, is an act of terrorism.
Do these human beings know that the rest of the world thinks their government is hair-on-fire crazy?
I mean, it's one thing to hate the US and Americans in general and it's one thing to find something offensive and say so, but when you can barely feed your own population and can't invade the South end of Korea when you're the North, it's not a show of good form to threaten a world super-power with war.
Jus sayin.
Mad.
---
Cleaned the dust up, tried to extract as much mottled dust from the interior of my PC as possible, and now watching Californication and cleaning my bedside table.
Still really tired for some reason, but doing college work after this.
--- // ---
Got tired of not being able to use iTunes which has all my music on it when I wanted to listen to my Linkin Park albums with an equalizer applied for rock [everything from music to audiobooks sounds better with it enabled] so finally checked into why the program was crashing a few seconds after launch.
First I thought it was a plug-in from Last.FM called Scrobbler, which is designed to categorize what you listen to and then make recommendations on new music. But after running it in safe-mode which disables all plug-ins, it took a few more seconds than usual but it still crashed.
So I went hunting for answers again and found out that iTunes 11 or something is set to try to connect to this Apple cloud service, and if it can't then the program crashes.
...that's just genius Apple, total genius. Let's install a cloud service component across all platforms of one of our flagship pieces of software, and then have it break the program a few seconds after start up if it doesn't find anything to connect to.
GENIUS.
Disabled it and it's been running now for longer than 4 minuets so I think we're good.
Fucking genius though. xD
---
Chap came from the estate agents to take some photos of the flat, but it seems he took only a few; the kitchen, bathroom, main bedroom and the living room, none of which I occupy.
Not that my room didn't need cleaning, but that photographic event had nothing to do with me.
Whatever.
---
Not feeling quite as tired as I was and getting on with some writing. Changing gears to college work shortly.
--- // ---
Updated Codex Mundus, my games design thesis blog, with sections for the primer, part 1 and part 2.
I like it so far. Pure information. Just got to do some programming now to update the blog side, but I got police college work to take care of and I'm hungry now [19:40] so I'm gonna go get some foods.
---
Feel like I've been on edge for several days now. Ever since last weekend. It was a rough weekend. Big panic and now ease of life. That's what I think it is.
Well, I say ease. Just spent several minuets wondering if my moving out is going to go smoothly. Despite not paying my rent in a timely fashion I'm wondering if I'm going to have enough to get new acom and eat reasonably over the next two weeks.
The answer is to keep going until I hit a wall, and then try to plow through it.
Getting food and then, taking a nap maybe or something cus I'm really damn tired.
--- // ---
Yeah, that's about it for today I think. Going to bed early at 10pm.
Didn't do any college work today [whoops]. Must get on with it tomorrow.
Showing posts with label Codex Mundus. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Codex Mundus. Show all posts
27/06/2014
26/06/2014
On Thursday...
...WAT... :O
Currently somewhere between food coma and oxygen deprivation.
Went to the hypermarket, bought a french stick, a tin of soup, and some crisps, with some premix chicken, bacon n sweetcorn mayo. Then ate quite a lot of all of it between coughing my lungs up cus for some reason the cold air made my lungs fill with fluid.
Can't fucking wait for the doctors on Wednesday when hopefully they'll be able to give me something so I stop coughing when I move about a very short walk.
Used to run 20 miles as a matter of course. Now I wheeze and cough up fluid when I take a short stroll to the hypermarket. Fucking life man, it sucks.
*takes caffeine pills* Leets do dis...
---
Listening to Linkin Park's newest album called The Hunting Party, which I had no idea had come out 2 weeks ago. I don't listen to music that often and remember to check to see if the few bands I like have released anything new lately about once every six months, if that. Takes me a few gos to decide if I like it or not, and am usually not impressed by the first play through, and currently I'm thinking this is drivil, but I always think that. I know me...Guilty All The Same sounds pretty cool though...
Need to restore iTunes is what cus without a music equalizer for Rock music just don't sound right.
---
Still watching Californication despite what I said, which isn't surprising. What I said was that it was hollow nonsense for stoners, but it grows on ya, and the creators have found their feet now and actually inserting some drama into it around S03-4 where Hank has a lot of relationships and then it comes out he boned a 16 year old and he hits rock bottom.
Wouldn't say it's inspired poetry or anything but it's better than the only other thing I have on my plate at the moment called 'Perception', which is a generic cop show with a twist of neuroscience. *shrug*
---
Shaved my face, head and naughty regions this morning.
Face cus I have uber stiff wire beard and it's like termites are trying to eat me if it grows beyond a few millimeters, so beards are out of the question.
Head because otherwise you can see this halo around my head where the tops thinning out and it looks really stupid, and because no hair is best for exercise, although that's a non-issue until I get my lungs sorted out. And
And naughty bits because I hate public hair. It's uncomfortable, it's heating, and chafes. Plus sexual activity is just easier without it in the way. The only issue with this is shaving every 5-6 days results in a sandpaper effect everywhere you shaved. This is cool on the face and scalp, but not so much on your nads. Worth it though in my view.
Each to their own, but I roll with my lawn mowed.
The irony of course is that I'm an ape everywhere else, and have a mane on my upper back which is kinda neat. Excess testosterone is probably why I'm going bald, but also why I'm strong and usually healthy, and I've never liked having hair on my head, so it's all for the best probably.
---
What else...
---
From my todo list I'm taking some me time today to update my blogs. This post, art assets, URL cleanup, and some programming, which incidentally I'm now blogging about in the Codex Mundus [Book of the World].
---
I'm basically rebuilding my games engine and adding in some of the new concepts I've been thinking about for a while, such as base program structure of primary/secondary UI's aaand spherical voxel based environments which can be customized by the user. I'll add those in as soon as I've disemboweled my quaternion based camera perspectives demo which showcases every possible perspective of 2D projected computer games.
Essentially what I'm making here is something between League of Legends and Landmark/Everquest Next which is an evolution of Minecraft.
Notch was a bloody pillock who knew and probably still knows all about programming but didn't and doesn't know games design, Sony are making all the same mistakes he did plus a bunch of new ones as they know graphics but not games design, and Riot Games can suck my cock for their mismanagement of an admittedly great MOBA.
I know more than they do because I'm smarter than they are. They are just luckier than I am which is why they have the money to build this shit.
---
What I fucking want more than anything right now is for someone to pay me money to build games so I could build a working prototype of my games thesis and then call these AAA studios and cultural icons a bunch of useless fuckers.
Among the philosophical issues with this notion is this; building the best game of all time, the most efficient, the most fun, the most well crafted doesn't actually mean shit because if and when I do it I'm going to be so pissed that I had to and did it under these circumstances that I'll insult anyone willing to produce it to the point of rejection.
I day dream of being given an award for building the best game of the year or some shit and then smashing it to bits with a hammer or something on stage and calling these people who've never thought about what they're doing properly idiots who have no right to pat me on the back for proving their lack of insight.
A craftsmen, an artisan, a genius doesn't care for the opinions of no-less-men. He only cares about the work. But the fact is:
That's just it really; these assholes don't know what they're doing, but they're in the position to do it, whereas I know what I'm doing, but no one wants to be shown that their hard work and effort is effectively an elephant's painting compared to a Picasso.
I just hate humanity, and in that special way that only those who actually know how fucking wrong everything is can hate it.
Whatever.
---
Tomorrow I need to get on with college work and then look for new acom at the start of next week before doing 2 exams for my certification in policing course on the weekend, and moving into new acom at the start of the following week.
---
Skipped the Tribunal today.
I know I made a big fuss over going anyway but I needed a shave, I needed to clean my shit up, I needed some me time, I didn't need to go to a tribunal and try to explain myself to a bunch of assholes who weren't going to believe me in any case.
The whole reason I wanted to cancel the tribunal was to get on with my own nonsense which once taken care of will get me employed with the police.
Taking time out from that in any respect is simply a waste of time. Chillax today, college work tomorrow, not waste time today, chillax tomorrow, and then college work on the weekend.
---
Some idiot contacted me about buying my vinyl weights set. Offered me a good price for them and then realized that they were vinyl and said that his mate's set cracked during 80kg deadlift and he got injured. Personally I find this utter nonsense. Had these things three years, used them for all kinds of exercise and never had an issue. Pillock.
---
...Thank fuck for that, the caffeine is finally kicking in.
And that's it really.
Cleaning my room and catching up on my laundry, updating my blogs with art and info, looking forward to doctors on Wednesday, college work tomorrow, no specific drama at the moment so long as I can focus and get the job done. Have a look at Codex Mundus for my programming work, please do.
GG.
Have a good one.
---
PS: Been trying to work out why I keep swearing and I think it's because I'm subconsciously quite angry over the tribunal fiasco. I'm right, they're wrong, and there's no way I can resolve it in my favor because no one gives a shit.
The thing with me is that my thoughts are logical and walled off from my emotions, so if I'm cogitating substantially I don't feel very much on the surface. My diction however belies that.
When injured I swear sulphurously, not because I mean the words but because the words are tied into my emotions. The logical part of my brain is processing the injury and trying to work out what to do about it, to mitigate and control the pain, etc. Reason and consciousness is latched to the information of my senses. The emotional part of my brain however is feeling pain, and as my diction is latched to my emotions I swear without feeling. My mouth runs but my consciousness isn't associated with what's being said.
Maybe it's because I'm a genius but I've always found that when I'm in one area of my brain - programming, for example, requires logical processing - I'm disassociated with other areas - I hardly ever laugh or feel pleasure because I spend most of my time employing reason for example.
Compartmentalization. Being in the zone. The warrior and the scholar.
I wouldn't say this role mechanism is unique to me, but it is something I'm better at then most people.
Anyway, I was just wondering what the fuck I was pissed off about. Probably the tribunal. Shit happens. Shit passes. It's cool.
Fin.
Currently somewhere between food coma and oxygen deprivation.
Went to the hypermarket, bought a french stick, a tin of soup, and some crisps, with some premix chicken, bacon n sweetcorn mayo. Then ate quite a lot of all of it between coughing my lungs up cus for some reason the cold air made my lungs fill with fluid.
Can't fucking wait for the doctors on Wednesday when hopefully they'll be able to give me something so I stop coughing when I move about a very short walk.
Used to run 20 miles as a matter of course. Now I wheeze and cough up fluid when I take a short stroll to the hypermarket. Fucking life man, it sucks.
*takes caffeine pills* Leets do dis...
---
Listening to Linkin Park's newest album called The Hunting Party, which I had no idea had come out 2 weeks ago. I don't listen to music that often and remember to check to see if the few bands I like have released anything new lately about once every six months, if that. Takes me a few gos to decide if I like it or not, and am usually not impressed by the first play through, and currently I'm thinking this is drivil, but I always think that. I know me...Guilty All The Same sounds pretty cool though...
Need to restore iTunes is what cus without a music equalizer for Rock music just don't sound right.
---
Still watching Californication despite what I said, which isn't surprising. What I said was that it was hollow nonsense for stoners, but it grows on ya, and the creators have found their feet now and actually inserting some drama into it around S03-4 where Hank has a lot of relationships and then it comes out he boned a 16 year old and he hits rock bottom.
Wouldn't say it's inspired poetry or anything but it's better than the only other thing I have on my plate at the moment called 'Perception', which is a generic cop show with a twist of neuroscience. *shrug*
---
Shaved my face, head and naughty regions this morning.
Face cus I have uber stiff wire beard and it's like termites are trying to eat me if it grows beyond a few millimeters, so beards are out of the question.
Head because otherwise you can see this halo around my head where the tops thinning out and it looks really stupid, and because no hair is best for exercise, although that's a non-issue until I get my lungs sorted out. And
And naughty bits because I hate public hair. It's uncomfortable, it's heating, and chafes. Plus sexual activity is just easier without it in the way. The only issue with this is shaving every 5-6 days results in a sandpaper effect everywhere you shaved. This is cool on the face and scalp, but not so much on your nads. Worth it though in my view.
Each to their own, but I roll with my lawn mowed.
The irony of course is that I'm an ape everywhere else, and have a mane on my upper back which is kinda neat. Excess testosterone is probably why I'm going bald, but also why I'm strong and usually healthy, and I've never liked having hair on my head, so it's all for the best probably.
---
What else...
---
From my todo list I'm taking some me time today to update my blogs. This post, art assets, URL cleanup, and some programming, which incidentally I'm now blogging about in the Codex Mundus [Book of the World].
---
I'm basically rebuilding my games engine and adding in some of the new concepts I've been thinking about for a while, such as base program structure of primary/secondary UI's aaand spherical voxel based environments which can be customized by the user. I'll add those in as soon as I've disemboweled my quaternion based camera perspectives demo which showcases every possible perspective of 2D projected computer games.
Essentially what I'm making here is something between League of Legends and Landmark/Everquest Next which is an evolution of Minecraft.
Notch was a bloody pillock who knew and probably still knows all about programming but didn't and doesn't know games design, Sony are making all the same mistakes he did plus a bunch of new ones as they know graphics but not games design, and Riot Games can suck my cock for their mismanagement of an admittedly great MOBA.
I know more than they do because I'm smarter than they are. They are just luckier than I am which is why they have the money to build this shit.
---
What I fucking want more than anything right now is for someone to pay me money to build games so I could build a working prototype of my games thesis and then call these AAA studios and cultural icons a bunch of useless fuckers.
Among the philosophical issues with this notion is this; building the best game of all time, the most efficient, the most fun, the most well crafted doesn't actually mean shit because if and when I do it I'm going to be so pissed that I had to and did it under these circumstances that I'll insult anyone willing to produce it to the point of rejection.
I day dream of being given an award for building the best game of the year or some shit and then smashing it to bits with a hammer or something on stage and calling these people who've never thought about what they're doing properly idiots who have no right to pat me on the back for proving their lack of insight.
A craftsmen, an artisan, a genius doesn't care for the opinions of no-less-men. He only cares about the work. But the fact is:
- Notch is an idiot and produced shit for kids. But those kids love Minecraft.
- Sony are a bunch of amateurs and are congratulating each other for their fine work. And people join in because they're the only game in town.
- Riot are so far up their own ass they're looking out through their own nostrils. And people worship them as despite being assholes their MOBA is the best MOBA available.
That's just it really; these assholes don't know what they're doing, but they're in the position to do it, whereas I know what I'm doing, but no one wants to be shown that their hard work and effort is effectively an elephant's painting compared to a Picasso.
I just hate humanity, and in that special way that only those who actually know how fucking wrong everything is can hate it.
Whatever.
---
Tomorrow I need to get on with college work and then look for new acom at the start of next week before doing 2 exams for my certification in policing course on the weekend, and moving into new acom at the start of the following week.
---
Skipped the Tribunal today.
I know I made a big fuss over going anyway but I needed a shave, I needed to clean my shit up, I needed some me time, I didn't need to go to a tribunal and try to explain myself to a bunch of assholes who weren't going to believe me in any case.
The whole reason I wanted to cancel the tribunal was to get on with my own nonsense which once taken care of will get me employed with the police.
Taking time out from that in any respect is simply a waste of time. Chillax today, college work tomorrow, not waste time today, chillax tomorrow, and then college work on the weekend.
---
Some idiot contacted me about buying my vinyl weights set. Offered me a good price for them and then realized that they were vinyl and said that his mate's set cracked during 80kg deadlift and he got injured. Personally I find this utter nonsense. Had these things three years, used them for all kinds of exercise and never had an issue. Pillock.
---
...Thank fuck for that, the caffeine is finally kicking in.
And that's it really.
Cleaning my room and catching up on my laundry, updating my blogs with art and info, looking forward to doctors on Wednesday, college work tomorrow, no specific drama at the moment so long as I can focus and get the job done. Have a look at Codex Mundus for my programming work, please do.
GG.
Have a good one.
---
PS: Been trying to work out why I keep swearing and I think it's because I'm subconsciously quite angry over the tribunal fiasco. I'm right, they're wrong, and there's no way I can resolve it in my favor because no one gives a shit.
The thing with me is that my thoughts are logical and walled off from my emotions, so if I'm cogitating substantially I don't feel very much on the surface. My diction however belies that.
When injured I swear sulphurously, not because I mean the words but because the words are tied into my emotions. The logical part of my brain is processing the injury and trying to work out what to do about it, to mitigate and control the pain, etc. Reason and consciousness is latched to the information of my senses. The emotional part of my brain however is feeling pain, and as my diction is latched to my emotions I swear without feeling. My mouth runs but my consciousness isn't associated with what's being said.
Maybe it's because I'm a genius but I've always found that when I'm in one area of my brain - programming, for example, requires logical processing - I'm disassociated with other areas - I hardly ever laugh or feel pleasure because I spend most of my time employing reason for example.
Compartmentalization. Being in the zone. The warrior and the scholar.
I wouldn't say this role mechanism is unique to me, but it is something I'm better at then most people.
Anyway, I was just wondering what the fuck I was pissed off about. Probably the tribunal. Shit happens. Shit passes. It's cool.
Fin.
